Sanctification through Motherhood

 

The past few days, today included, have been doozies.  I don’t think that’s a real world, but I imagine that is OK.  We’ve been taken hostage by some sort of summer cold-flu-yuck and it is really throwing me off.  I feel pulled in every direction – I am tired – I am tired of taking care of sick bodies when I’m trying to recover -  I miss my quality afternoon alone time when I just get to have a moment in silence (often accompanied by some yummy iced-coffee!).  I miss having my arms free when trying to change a load of sick-laundry.  Are you seeing a trend in these thoughts?

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I FULL well understand the tendency and temptation to take blogging and turn it into this “look how perfect and well rounded my life and thoughts are” situation – so I by no means want to do that.  There is some honest emotion in those thoughts – it is legitimate to be tired.  It is not wrong to be thankful for and savor alone time.  BUT…

When I dwell on those things – when I dwell on myself – I lose my thankful spirit.  I do not cultivate things which last.  I do not create peace and joy in my home.  I lose sight of that which is truly life.  You see I have MUCH to be thankful for.   I generally have a healthy household.  I am so thankful to be at home with my young ones and therefore even GET to have an hour of peace in the afternoon.  When I am just downright angry that baby boy has once again had a blow out and therefore needs a bath (when there is dairy in the car – and sister is just having one of those days and poor hubby is back in bed feeling miserable); well I am blessed with a home where cleaning my children with clean water, buying good food, and having multiple beds is a staple, something I just expect.  When my arms are tired?  Oh foolish me, what a blessing to have a sweet bundle who feels better when his momma holds him.  When I allow my joy and patience to be stolen from me so easily, I am choosing not to meditate on that which is joy-giving and life-sustaining.

 

So, with God’s grace I will try again.  Notice there is grace even now, because I’ve had 45 minutes of alone time to even meditate on these thoughts and sip a little bit o’ joe.  Oh my.  With grace I will not pretend not to have emotions, but choose that which is of Him and for Him.

 

(the pictures?  they’re random, but they make me smile – and I kind of needed to just smile!)